ASK AN EGG DONOR™

THIS ISSUE: *My husband’s family object to us using an egg donor. *Infertility workshops or conferences? My husband’s parents object to us using an egg donor. It began with a few moans and groans, now they’re saying they’re reconsidering the wills. They insist they won’t consider the child their grandchild and believe science has gone to far (they won’t admit it, but there’s also the what-will-the-neighbor’s-think attitude.). I don’t care about the money, and neither does my husband really, but then, he has a lot more to lose. …and possibly everything to gain. I respect you have both endured enough and weighed many options before you reached the point of considering egg donation. I can only imagine the pressure and/or guilt your in-laws are exerting, but I implore you to stay strong. They might not agree with your decisions, but they will need to accept and respect them. Please shore-up your support networks in the face of this opposition; you deserve to head down this path equipped with much kindness and compassion. And if it helps to know, I’ve heard from others in a similar situation, and in each case, the baby’s arrival was a tremendously healing gift ─on many levels. Can you recommend any workshops or conferences to meet others who are facing infertility? Our clinic has information sessions and individual counseling of course, and while that’s been a huge help, I want to meet others. We’re in California. Resolve New England (resolvenewengland.org) facilitates the country’s only infertility conference especially for consumers. [Disclosure: I’m a past exhibitor, and receive no compensation, directly or in kind, for recommending them.] They present a full program running the gamut of issues facing those who are navigating infertility. And of course, it’s also a wonderful chance to speak to other aspiring parents. This year it will be held on Sat, Nov 05 in Marlborough, Massachusetts. I’d also recommend a support group through the national Resolve chapter (resolve.org). My best wishes you. Column is not a substitute for medical or legal advice. Alicia Young is a journalist, speaker, and author of the award-winning Two Eggs, Two Kids: An egg donor’s account of friendship, infertility & secrets. She has a background in social work counseling and journalism. In her spare time, Alicia handles parasols and power tools with equal ease (not really, but she helpfully holds the flashlight when needed). Based in the US; speaks internationally. @AskanEggDonor www.savvylife.net Questions? askaneggdonor@hotmail.com © 2016 Alicia Young.