Alicia Young

Trying to Live Gracefully in a Rushed World

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In Celebration of You.

March 28, 2014 by Alicia Young

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A daughter dabs gently at her mother’s mouth, as she feeds the older woman and holds the thin, papery hand that once dried her tears over a broken toy or a broken heart. A professor challenges her class to pose a dynamic solution to the problem before them. A newlywed grieves a job lost, a dream deferred for her partner, who got laid off today. As women, we embrace compassion and support, selflessly playing cheerleader to others. We listen, coax, encourage and boost our loved ones in their quests, ushering them through their dark times. We remind them of their successes, their accomplishments, and their creativity. Why then, are we sometimes slow to recognize our own achievements? Our uniqueness? And why are we equally hesitant to celebrate them? As girls, we are often raised to accord more significance to the needs— and even the whims— of others, more importance than our own. There is a time and place for that, as any mother knows. But when we carve out some time for ourselves—even mere minutes— we are sending a powerful message, both to those around us, and to ourselves. We need to own our skills, to embrace our mindsets and to value our way of engaging the world. We need to claim time to recharge and rejuvenate. My challenge to you:  find a way to celebrate yourself— this week, this month, this year. Hang a sign on the door—literally or metaphorically—and declare this hour, this day, this weekend yours. It’s vital. It’s graceful. It’s overdue. How do you take time out to celebrate yourself?

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Comments

  1. Francie says

    April 7, 2014 at 7:05 pm

    Hi Alicia,
    Loved your post. So many need to heed your words. I confess, if I really need a break I turn my back on the dishes or laundry. I could spend all my time puttering around the house. And sometimes, my family is really kind and will take over, even dinner.

    Thanks for the reminders. I think I will crack a magazine for a few before starting dinner.

    Reply
  2. Francie says

    April 7, 2014 at 7:03 pm

    Hi Alicia,
    Loved your post. So many need to heed your words. I confess, if I really need a break I turn my back on the dishes or laundry. I could spend all my time puttering around the house. And sometimes, my family is really kind and will take over, even dinner.

    Thanks for the reminders. I think I will crack a magazine for a few before starting dinner.

    Reply
    • Alicia Young says

      April 15, 2014 at 11:14 am

      Hi Francie, lovely to see you here!
      Sorry for the delay, I took a little longer than expected to get over a recent trip.
      Good on you taking a break – dishes and laundry will always be there!
      Now you’ve got me looking for my favorite trashy magazine …
      Cheers,
      Alicia

      Reply
  3. Lucia says

    April 5, 2014 at 2:07 pm

    Great blog Alicia. I really enjoy your topics which make me think. My regular dose of grace. Keep up the good work!
    Lucia

    Reply
    • Alicia Young says

      April 15, 2014 at 11:17 am

      Hi Lucia, thanks for the encouragement, I appreciate it!
      Best wishes,
      Alicia

      Reply
  4. Lucia says

    April 5, 2014 at 2:05 pm

    Great blog Alicia. Really enjoy your topics which make me think. My regular dose of grace. Keep up the good work!
    Lucia

    Reply
  5. Marie says

    April 5, 2014 at 6:01 am

    Hi Alicia,
    What a thoughtful post! I love reading you blog and my friends & I have really enjoyed your book. It makes me think of graceful ways to approach everyday issues & I often pick up you book & relax with a hot drink and settle down for some ‘me time’ and flick through the anecdotes full of humour and insight!
    Looking forward to your next book.
    All the best, Marie x

    Reply
    • Alicia Young says

      April 15, 2014 at 11:24 am

      Hello Marie,
      You’re so encouraging, thank you! I’m so touched that you enjoyed the book, and to hear that you dip in and out as time allows – that’s just how I hoped and pictured someone reading it.
      The next book is taking shape, thanks, and I’m aiming to have it out soon. I’ll keep you posted.
      Cheers,
      Alicia

      Reply
  6. charmaine says

    April 1, 2014 at 7:55 pm

    Hi Alicia
    What a great post and something that truly resonates. I know I should just spend time for myself, but don’t for so many reasons. It is hard at first to separate or highlight quality time for myself, but I think I have now got the hang of it and enjoy going for a quiet walk around the block, the scenery and the contemplative nature of walking armed with some good music on my ipod, is very restorative – and addictive I might add – I feel out of sorts when I miss this special time – for whatever reason. Thank you for reminding me, all of us that it is okay to take care and nuture ourselves..
    Going for my walk right now!
    Best wishes
    Charmaine

    Reply
    • Alicia Young says

      April 15, 2014 at 11:20 am

      Hey Charmaine,
      So glad to hear that you’ve carved out and claimed your walking time as an important part of your day. It’s vital that we have out own go-to time when we can close the door on the world… or just let it drift by us without demanding our attention.
      Thanks for your input, always appreciated!
      Alicia

      Reply
  7. Cloris Kylie says

    March 31, 2014 at 11:00 am

    Great post, Alicia, and great questions to contemplate. I think being aware of how precious we are (no matter our life circumstances) is the best way to start celebrating ourselves. Thank you!

    Reply
  8. Debi says

    March 28, 2014 at 11:50 pm

    Hi Alicia, long time no ‘see’ – great to see you pop up on FB! I always love your posts, which obviously take some time and thought…… I read it and noticed that I didn’t have an immediate response, so went on to the next article that popped up. I found myself returning to your post in my thoughts and decided to actually stop and think about it, at which time I realised that I did have quite a few thoughts on the subject and actually that became the point….!! We live in a world that is constantly ‘feeding’ us with a diet that we don’t necessarily want or need and we need to just stop and think for ourselves more, spend quality time and nurture ourselves. It sort of ties into your January post too about saying ‘No’ – it’s human nature to want to please and be liked, but we don’t always gain that through other people, it can also come from ourselves and it’s important to sometimes say no to something in order to spend some quality time with yourself & whilst it can feel selfish, I’ve found that being honest that you need time alone is quite liberating in itself! I am reminded of a book by Joseph Dispenza ‘God on my own’ where he spent 7 years in a monastery and left to pursue a spiritual life without organised religion but found it very hard because he just needed to be on his own quite a lot – when he finaly found his voice to be honest about that with friends and family, he found some peace and was a much happier and peaceful man because he had given himself what he needed. As always, great to read your posts Alicia and hope everything is great with you! All the best, Debx

    Reply
    • Alicia Young says

      March 30, 2014 at 3:32 pm

      Hey Deb!
      I appreciate your patience, things have been full-on as I prep the second book. And you contribute such thoughtful remarks, thank you! You’re right—we are bombarded by society—and the advertising world does back-up vocals– about what constitutes “happiness” (this car!), “satisfaction” (this vacation!), or “success” (someone’s autumn/winter collection). Finding our voice to declare our own time to tune out the noise and be alone is critical. And I checked out the book you mention – it looks like a good read!
      http://www.amazon.com/God-Your-Own-Spiritual-Religion/dp/0787983128/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1396211424&sr=8-1&keywords=joseph+dispenza
      Cheers,
      Alicia xx

      Reply
  9. Holly says

    March 28, 2014 at 6:09 pm

    Hi Alicia,
    You’re so right. In our hectic schedules women often meet the needs and challenges of so many others, our family, friends, colleagues…it’s important to take time out for ourselves and to do this without any sense of guilt to recharge our batteries & to enjoy it. I love spending time with my family, but I also love having the house to myself, reading a book without interruption or seeing a friend for coffee without thinking of all the things that need to be down at home/work. Appreciating my own time, expanding my mind and embracing friendships are important too & a celebration of oneself. I may not have a Doctorate or a Noble Peace Prize but I feel pretty lucky to have wonderful people in my life. You know who you are, and have helped me shape who I am today. For that I celebrate…Oh and it’s also Mothers Day in UK this weekend so I’ll celebrate that too! Thanks Alicia your posts also make me think. xx

    Reply
    • maria says

      March 30, 2014 at 4:38 am

      Firstly, Happy Mothers Day Holly, love you lots Maria, hope you had a great day,
      Secondly, I love this Alicia, it is so spot on!

      Reply
      • Alicia Young says

        March 30, 2014 at 3:33 pm

        Hello Maria,
        Lovely to see you back on this pages – I’m chuffed! I hope you’re also finding time for yourself, too. It occurred to me the other day – when we have an appointment with someone else, be they a doctor or dentist, we honor that because we respect their time. Our personal time, however briefly, deserves the same importance!
        My wish for you is a well-deserved little peace and quiet! 
        Cheers,
        Alicia xx

        Reply
    • Alicia Young says

      March 30, 2014 at 3:32 pm

      Hello Holly,
      And Happy Mother’s Day! Your feedback is always so considered. You make a great point that when we carve out time to enjoy our own company, it recharges and rejuvenates us. That’s vital for a sense of inner equilibrium. It also made me think—we used to hear so much about multi-tasking—and while I get the need for that, there is definitely a time to allow ourselves one thing at a time. Your support for this blog means so much! Xxx

      Reply

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